Friendship is considered to be one of the most powerful things one could experience. Great friends have the ability to change moods, foster confidence, and promote personal growth. Great friends are present in the best moments, and in the difficult ones.
If you have a friend that is unexpectedly pregnant, it can be difficult to navigate your conversations with them. You don’t know if you should say “Congratulations” or “I’m sorry.” Things may feel tense, or even awkward. Despite the whirlwind of emotions that your friend is feeling, the honest reality is, your friend needs you.
The best thing you can do for her is to be near, be available, and be a listening ear. More than advice or encouragement, your friend simply needs you to be present. She needs to know that she is not alone. You have the ability to help her overcome her fears, worries, and anxieties through your steadfast presence in her life.
Advice for Helping a Friend with an Unplanned Pregnancy
Your friend is likely in a state of fear and confusion. Although it may be difficult for them, it is imperative that they voice their honest thoughts aloud with someone they trust. You can be that person.
When your friend shares their thoughts with you, listen to their tone, their emotion, and their cadence. Ask them to articulate their fears associated with their pregnancy. Ask them to share their unfiltered desires as they navigate their pregnancy options. Instead of offering your advice, choose to offer nearness.
Be Steadfast in Your Support
It can be difficult to determine the amount of space you need to give your friend during this time. You do not want to burden them as they determine their pregnancy decision, but you also want them to know you are someone they can lean on. For a woman facing an unexpected pregnancy, it can be a temptation to isolate. She doesn’t want to burden her loved ones with her emotions, so she bottles them up. As her friend, make an intentional effort to position yourself as a person who wants to know the messy details of her mind.
If you are able, show up at her home. Bring her flowers. Sit down with her and simply be present. Be clear with her about why you are there. Tell her that you want to be a listening ear, and you want to hear her thoughts about her pregnancy.
If she asks for your advice about her situation, offer your opinion, but refrain from telling her what to do. Encourage her that she needs to make her own decision.
Offer to go to the Appointment with Her at Choices Resource Center
The best next step your friend can make after she learns she is pregnant is to schedule an appointment at Choices Resource Center. To show you are a supportive friend, offer to go to her appointment with her. Oftentimes, these appointments are intimidating, so having someone else present can bring peace to a fearful situation.